How the Devlin Stole Christmas: A Billionaire Cowboy Prequel ~ Those Devilish Devlins Read online

  So I’d gathered the backbone I couldn’t find last night and dragged myself from bed. I didn’t stop for coffee or even a coat. I slid Max’s keys into the pocket of my jeans, retrieved the protective chaps and power saw from the barn, and went to work, carefully and methodically cutting my way through the downed tree.

  Her sweet voice ran through my head…

  We could build a future on it. A lifetime of Christmas Eves. Waking up in your arms on Christmas morning.

  I’d sell my soul for that future. Only it couldn’t happen.

  Reality slithered in and I realized how my weakness was going to cause Max pain. Again. Me? I deserved every bleak day coming my way, but Max didn’t. It wasn’t her fault she fell in love with the wrong man. It wasn’t her fault I was weak when she was near me.

  The devil on my shoulder chimed in…

  You really fucked up.

  You think? No thanks to you. You kept whispering in my head, urging me on, asshole.

  You should know better than to listen to me. Time to cut Max loose. Clear out the tree and get the woman out of here.

  Exactly my plan. As soon as I had enough of the tree cleared to fit Max’s truck through, I turned her truck around and maneuvered it through the opening. There was a bag of clothes on the passenger seat, so I grabbed them out for her.

  I sucked in one bracing breath of cold air and went inside. It was time for both of us to let go of the past and move on.

  Max was awake, drinking a mug of coffee at the kitchen island. Her long blond hair fell down her back in a riot of soft curls. I clenched my jaw at the memory of running my fingers through its silkiness. She wore my damn flannel shirt which didn’t cover nearly enough.

  “Morning, Locke.” Her voice was still rough from sleep and sexy as hell. “Merry Christmas.”

  “Yeah. You too.” She sat there looking like the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen and I couldn’t touch her. Never would again. Merry damn Christmas to me.

  “Sorry about wearing your shirt.” She shrugged and sent me a small smile. “We forgot to dry our clothes yesterday, so I threw them in your washer. I hope you don’t mind.”

  “I don’t mind.” I dropped her bag of clean clothes on the counter in front of her. “I found these in your truck. The drive’s cleared, so you can get dressed and head home.”

  “Oh, okay. I’ll go, um, get dressed.” She uncrossed her long legs and slid from the stool, moving past me with a soft smile.

  Huh. That went easier than I anticipated. Which made me suspicious.

  I poured myself a mug of coffee while I waited for Max. She was taking her sweet time. Another reason why I figured she was up to something because she’d never been one of those women who take an hour to get ready. Honestly, she didn’t need to. She’d always been a natural beauty. The wind and fresh air on the ranch did more for Max than a blow dryer and make up ever did for other women.

  My gaze caught on the decorated tree and I couldn’t stop the smile from forming on my lips. I’d made her a promise and I’d like to think I kept it. I hoped she’d look back on this Christmas with happiness. Maybe once the ache in my chest eased—forty or fifty years from now—I could do the same.

  Max returned, dressed in a pair of figure-hugging jeans and a low-cut black sweater which made her eyes look brighter than Bluebonnets in the spring. Her hair was up in a messy knot on her head, leaving the sensitive spot on the back of her neck bare, tempting, and easily accessible.

  Whoa, no. Not easily accessible. Because she was leaving.

  “Sorry I took so long.” She turned her bright smile on me. “What should we cook for breakfast? I vote for pancakes.”

  “We’re not having breakfast, Max.” Dragging this out wouldn’t be good for either of us.

  “It’s Christmas morning.” She blinked at me like I was some hick cowpoke who didn’t know how to seat a horse. “We always have a special breakfast.”

  “I’m sure Dodo and Jed have one waiting for you at the ranch.” I dug her truck keys out of my pocket and slid them across the island to her. “Here you go.”

  “I’m sorry, but what is your problem, Locke Devlin?” Max threw her hands on her hips and glared across the island at me.

  “No problem.” I set down my coffee and crossed my arms over my chest. “It’s just time to go.”

  “Last night you made love to me multiple times, but now you can’t push me out fast enough?” She notched her chin up at me. “Is it because I’m not girly enough?”

  “Yeah, that’s exactly what it is.”

  “Whatever. Like I care.” She snorted out a breath of air and shrugged. “You aren’t the only cowboy on my dance card.”

  “What the hell does that mean?” I frowned across at her, feeling like some green-eyed monster was clawing its way out of my chest.

  “I mean, you were good—that thing you did with your tongue—I’m sure that memory will come in handy in the future. But there are other cowboys with talented tongues.”

  “I know what you’re doing. It’s not going to work, Max.” It was working.

  “I’m just saying, if you don’t want me, I’m sure I can find someone who does. I bet your brothers wouldn’t kick me out of their house this fast. Heck, knowing them, I’d probably still be naked in bed.”

  I hadn’t punched one of my brothers in years, but I had a sudden urge to fix that.

  “Maybe one of them will cook me a Christmas breakfast,” she said, acting all innocent like she wasn’t trying to drive me crazy.

  I was seconds away from grabbing up the phone and having a word with my brothers when someone knocked—more like pounded—on the front door.

  The interruption came at the perfect time. Max was playing me like a fiddle and I needed to step away and calm down. I walked into the foyer with Max trailing after me and swung open the front door.

  Max’s father stood on my porch looking grim. I figured with a rifle gripped tightly in his hands, he wasn’t here to wish me a merry Christmas.

  “Jed.” I nodded once before slicing a sharp gaze over to Max. “Seriously? You called your dad?”

  12

  Max

  “Pfft, no. It’s a total coincidence he’s here with a gun the morning after you’ve had your wicked way with me.” I sucked in a small breath, covered my mouth with my hand, and threw in a few wide-eyed blinks, going for innocent. “Oops. I guess that slipped out.”

  “Is that true, Locke?” Dad tipped up the brim of his cowboy hat to frown across at Locke.

  “Yes, sir,” Locke said, without even a glance my way. “I’m sorry to say it is.”

  Sorry? Sorry? I was tempted to grab my dad’s rifle and whack the stubborn cowboy over the head with it.

  “Locke, you know you’re like a son to me. But I’m afraid there is a line I can’t let you cross.” Dad’s voice held an edge of warning, enough to make Locke’s jaw firm up and his shoulders stiffen. “Did you take advantage of Max? I’ll need the truth now, or I’ll have to shoot you.”

  “Wait, what?” I jerked around to Dad, shaking my head vigorously. “No. No you won’t. He’s kidding about the shooting part.”

  “Not kidding, kitten.” His big hands tightened on the cool steel in his hands. “If the answer’s yes, then I have one question for you… You gonna marry my Max?”

  Marry me? Sure my pulse kicked up at the word, but I didn’t want to force Locke’s hand. That wasn’t what this was about. He hadn’t taken advantage of me. If anything, I’d taken advantage of him. No, I just wanted to nudge him into letting me back into his life. Before he had time to build the wall back up between us, stronger than before. If he did, I feared I’d never break it down again.

  “No, sir. I’m not going to marry Max.” Locke crossed his arms over his chest and stared my father in the eyes. “Nothing’s changed since the last time we talked about it.”

  “Excuse me, what? You talked with my dad about marrying me?” My breath seized in my lungs like a giant fist re
ached out and squeezed my chest. I went light-headed. “When? When did you and dad discuss us getting married?”

  “Three Christmases ago,” Locke said without even a glance my way.

  “This is a joke, right?” The top of my head tingled and my fingertips went numb with shock. “You were actually going to ask me to marry you?”

  He didn’t respond, only clenched his jaw even harder so I could see the muscles contract. Obviously, I wasn’t getting any more from Locke. I whipped around to face my father.

  “Why didn’t you tell me?” This made no sense. He knew I’d been in love with Locke since forever.

  “Because I talked him out of it,” my dad said.

  “What? Why?” I shook my head, trying to ignore the sharp pain slicing through my brain. “Why would you do that?”

  “It doesn’t matter why,” Locke interrupted. “He was right. It would have been a mistake. Just like it would be now.”

  My dad and Locke exchanged a knowing look before Dad nodded.

  “Um, excuse me. Hello. I’m standing right here. Don’t you think I should have a say in this? I think it matters a—” I stopped because that’s when my brain registered the rest of what Locke had said. “A mistake? Why would it have been a mistake?”

  “Let it go, Max.” Locke cut me off like he was trying to hide our past. Like I was his dirty little secret. Or maybe he was just trying to keep my father from shooting him where he stood. “The past doesn’t matter.”

  “It matters. It’s always mattered. And three years ago you made a promise, maybe not in word but in deed. It matters.”

  Locke glanced at my father, sucked in a breath, and then turned his gaze on me. “You’re right. I’m willing to marry you, Max. If that’s what you want.”

  “Willing?” What in the hell? What I want? Meaning he didn’t.

  His head jerked in a cool nod and he looked about as enthusiastic as if he’d offered to clean horse shit from the barns. Every day. For the rest of his life.

  Everything inside me went cold. If someone had stabbed a steel-sharp icicle into my chest, I couldn’t have felt colder. My heart hurt as everything I’d ever dreamed about—Locke and me together—died. This wasn’t the way it was supposed to be. He was supposed to be happy about the idea of us together. Once he realized we still had that magical connection, he was supposed to throw open his arms and his heart and want me. Need me.

  In that instant I knew. I knew it wouldn’t be enough. Knowing Locke was “willing” to marry me—make a lifetime commitment—because of his respect for my father…and not because he couldn’t live without me. Not because he loved me. Pain sliced through my heart, leaving it shredded. For the first time since I’d met Locke, I decided it would hurt less to not have him in my life at all rather than take the crumbs he offered.

  My world shifted, tilting off its axis. It was an out-of-body experience as I stood in front of the two men I loved most in the world—and neither one heard my heart break. But it did. Right there in Locke’s foyer—my heart shattered into a million fragile pieces I’d never put back together.

  “You know what? I’m good.” I had to suck in air through my tight throat, but I forced the words out. I needed to escape as quickly as possible. I refused to fall apart in front of Locke Devlin.

  “You sure, Max?” Dad asked.

  “Very. Locke, I’m sorry I messed up your Christmas Eve and Christmas morning.” I focused my gaze on his chin, since looking into his eyes was more than I could handle right now. “Merry Christmas, Locke Devlin. I hope your life is full of them.”

  “That’s it?” He frowned, looking confused that I was giving up. “You hope my life is full of merry Christmas mornings and you’re out?”

  “I’m trying to be mature here, so don’t push me, cowboy.” It had taken me a long time to understand, but I got it now. “Yeah. I’m out. It’s probably better this way. Thanks to you, I’m finally ready to move on.”

  “I said I was willing, Max.” His face had gone stiff and his voice tight and growly. “What else do you want from me?”

  What did I want from him? Only everything.

  And since he couldn’t give that to me, it was time for me to finally walk away.

  13

  Locke

  I stood on my front porch and watched Max drive away feeling hollowed out and empty. A too familiar feeling from the many days of my childhood when we went without. Days of desperation for the smallest crumb of both food and love.

  Once Max’s truck disappeared around the bend, Jed moved off the porch to stow his rifle in his truck cab and then took his time walking back. He planted his boot on the bottom step, looking to settle in for a few words. The man had given me wise counsel over the years, but I didn’t particularly want to hear it this time.

  I leaned one shoulder against the cedar porch post, shoved my hands into the front pockets of my jeans, and stiffened my muscles to absorb the shot, prepared to listen anyway.

  “I thought we’d been through this, son.” He tilted his head to look at me under the brim of his hat. “Settled this three Christmases ago. Do you remember what we talked about that morning?”

  I remembered. I remembered everything from that Christmas morning. Even the details I’d tried hard to forget. Tried to bury deep in my soul where they wouldn’t hurt as much. Where they wouldn’t be a constant reminder of what I’d had to let go.

  I remembered waking up with Max in my arms and feeling hopeful for the first time in my life…

  Hope soared into my chest like an eagle on a warm thermal breeze. Hope at a future with Maxie. Working side-by-side. Letting her quirky humor help the long days go faster. Holding her in my arms at night, giving me something to look forward to at the end of every day. Making a life together.

  As the sun rose, I placed a kiss on Max’s cheek, tucked the wool blanket around her, and slipped away. I knew exactly what I wanted to give Max for Christmas, but I had to talk to Jed first. I approached Jed with confidence; I knew he liked and trusted me. I had zero doubt that I could love his daughter forever and provide a good life for her.

  Max’s dad was sitting on his front porch rocker drinking his coffee. I took off my hat and got right to it.

  “Jed, I’d like your permission to ask Max to marry me.”

  He lowered his mug and stared out at the pastures for a long-silent moment before facing me.

  “I appreciate the respect you’re showing me by asking me. I know you love my Max. I’ve watched it growing for years.” His blue gaze pierced mine. “But sometimes love means you’ve got to make sacrifices for the person you love. Hard sacrifices. Do you love her enough to do that, Locke?”

  “Yes, sir. I’d do anything for Maxie.”

  “That’s what I thought. Ranching is a tough life. It’s hard on a woman. It wears a person down and takes a heavy toll. It’s also dangerous and sometimes deadly. There’s not a day goes by I don’t feel guilty over my Tillie’s death. I want Max to have the chance to escape it. She’s smart as a whip. Don’t be the anchor that weighs her down. If you love her, son, you’ll want that for her too.”

  I did love her. Jed was right about Maxie. She was smart and a college degree would be her ticket out of small town ranch life. I didn’t want to hold her down. I wanted her to soar.

  “I want what’s best for her.” Was loving someone supposed to feel like having your heart ripped from your chest? I absolutely knew I couldn’t face her—not if I was supposed to let her go. “I’m going to take some time off. If you can spare me.”

  He nodded, understanding. “Take the time. Take until the second week of January if you want.”

  Right. Because Max would be back at school by then. That’s what I did. I left the ranch early Christmas morning without saying goodbye to Maxie. At first she called nonstop. Left me messages. They started out confused and then tearful—those damn well broke me—and then finally angry until—unable to take any more—I finally changed my number.

  D
eep down, I’d known I’d never be over Max.

  I guess I just thought after three years, it wouldn’t hurt this much.

  “You’re only making it harder on both of you by starting something you know can’t happen.”

  “Right. I didn’t plan on this happening. It’s just that Max blindsided me. I know that’s no excuse, but…”

  “She’s a force, all right.” Jed stared off down the drive. “Although, I don’t think you’ll have to worry about Max anymore. Not after today.”

  No. Jed was wrong about that. I’d always worry about Max. I’d always think about Max. Every day for as long as I lived.

  “It’s like you said, Locke. Nothing’s changed. Max has a bright future in the city. Did she tell you she’s got three job offers already?”

  “No. She didn’t mention that.” I closed my eyes, trying to picture her dressed in business clothes and working in an office—and couldn’t.

  I can’t breathe in the city. It’s too crowded with people too busy to say hello or even offer a smile. And how can they live without seeing the horizon? Or feel the wind in their face as they race across the fields?

  “I have to confess, there were years when I was afraid I’d failed her. Without a mother’s guidance, she ran wild all over the ranch. Trying to fit in with all you cowboys. Riding hell bent for leather, taking too many risks, jumping into pens with ornery bulls and wild horses. Hell, I even caught her having a tobacco spitting contest with Liam once.” Jed ran a shaking hand around his neck and let out a deep breath. “It’s a hard life. Too hard. Getting her off the ranch is the best thing for her. You can see that, can’t you?”

  Couldn’t see that either. Not after spending time with her. I couldn’t see the future he was describing for Max. Instead, there was a growing whisper inside my head... You know her. Maybe better than her own father. She’d told me in a thousand ways.